this just in....
knitty news flash number one:
the other night, Tif had an epiphany of the knitty kind whilst admiring fair isle sweater vests and Latvian mittens. do not set your sights so high her epiphany told her, bring them back to reality, bring them back to squares and rectangles... and so she did. after the small miracle happened, the elation she felt inside was somewhat similar to the elation felt upon completing a crocheted granny square several years and many moons ago. knowing it was a moment of utmost importance in her crafty journey through life, she pinned her little swatch of colourway goodness safely and labeled it 'a small miracle ~ specimen #1', signed and dated it for all to see in mossy shed.
she noted after a day or so had passed, her lads of three were oblivious to her knitty miracle and so she removed it from the wall and wafted it under her man's nose with exclamations of just what a miracle it was. getting little more than a distracted 'oh yes, i see, yes that's great' she realized her feelings of not being patted on the back nor rewarded with a gold sticky star from her man were not the feelings to be carrying around. instead she must pity the man, for indeed he was unaware of just how momentous it is when 2 sticks and 2 yarns get together and 'make happy'. in the meantime, Tif plans to make more specimens and pin them to her wall, as is always the way with Tif she dreams big and dreams of a whole wall filled with framed knitted specimens of all colours and sizes and as is usually also the way... the chances of it ever happening are pie in the sky
knitty news flash number two:
whilst burning the midnight oil with Mr Lurgy, Tif realized life was too short to be a thrower and went about seeing if being a picker was her thing. after pondering the moves in her head she chose a lovely little vintage pair of jolly red needles and some lovely JoJoLand yarn (from the store) thus creating something for her display whilst dabbling in picking. (ah yes, even with Mr Lurgy visiting her clever crafty 'kill 2 birds with 1 stone' (but she didn't really literally, been over that one before) cunning cogs were still turning). less than five minutes of slow methodical picking and Tif declared to Mr Lurgy, Little Olive (the hot water bottle) and Used Dog (feeling tres old) that indeed, a picker she would be, forever and ever more for it would appear, she should always have been a picker, she just did not know it for 38 years. Tif then pondered why this was and came up with a brilliant conclusion and one she was quite proud of. as a crocheter surely it feels more right to have the yarn in the left hand to pick with and in doing so, leaves her right hand in place rather than this big old fiasco every time she wished to do a stitch of throwing her whole right hand up in the air, wrapping the needle around, whilst being held by her left hand 'steady', to come back and be reclaimed again by her right hand. by the time she got to the end of a row she was exhausted... but not any longer, right and left hands stay firmly where they should and may proceed with picking forever more
knitty news flash number three:
Tif is wise to the fact her job is starting tres soon, she is also wise to the fact tomorrow is POS training day. not knowing what POS meant she quickly learnt it meant Point of Sale. this in turn made her wonder what other abbreviated wording must she learn pronto not to let the side down. what if a work dearie were to call out "Tif, quick OHN, i NYTHWP and after that CYSTS before YTYGB". she would be clueless and instead of hearing it as "Tif, quick, over here now, i need you to help with pricing and after that can you stock the shelves before you take your grand break", Tif may well have understood it as "Tif, quick Owen Henry Neil, i no you thought he was perfect and after that can you stop the staring before you think you're gone batty". Tif realizes there is still much to learn for her new job and much of which will be learnt on the job as days are fast approaching to the big jolly grand opening day, where she will be working 2 till 6 in the afternoon. she was hopeful she may have the job of 'greeter at the door' and 'sheep stamper' of little hands and Mr Till with his jolly scary looking till like stuff going on would be put in the capable hands of another. however it would appear 'greeter and stamper' is not a job title and she may well have to summon all her snoopy courage and dabble with Mr Till while doing her deep breathing exercises
knitty news flash number four:
despite dancing with Mr Lurgy, dreaming of yarny specimens, picking away to her picky hearts content and going dolally with learning abbreviations, Tif has indeed continued with her 'collection of sorts', woolly knee socks pulled up each and every morn, doing all the fiddly things which she has put off for weeks now due to Mr Procrastinator from the 'collection of sorts' department coming to visit most days
and there concludes the knitty news flash for today,
over to Mr Weather in the other studio ...
"why thank you Mr K N Flash, well as you can see, its a bit of a mixed few old days on the horizon, lots of wind and rain heading our way and in some places, high on the hills we are likely to see a bit of sleet. good news though, after a few days this should move on through and Mr Sun will follow for a little while. my advice though for the next day or two, stay home, stay warm, stay dry and stay knitty"
