a doily crafty carty moment...

yesterday i was greatly distracted by two things

thing one: this doily moment found whilst reading the fabby Victoria's blog whilst eating my breakfast. i gasped, i followed the link and within seconds all i wished to do was make little doily hammocks for my sedums and succulents. i could think of nothing else, such was my lust for this brilliant doily idea

thing two: my lovely friend Jennette dropped by with a most marvelous industrial rolling trolley she was kind enough to off load on me. 

big old industrial castors which have a mind of their own

a 'big beasty' of a trolley

i see this 'big beasty' of a trolley as being most handy dandy when i have a bricks and mortars store (after all, how often do they come along?!) and in the meantime, whilst it waits to find a space in our bedroom, it has taken up residence in our family room. i did not know it at the time, but i now like it in our family room and think i may indeed have great trouble relocating it to our bedroom...

on that note i must tell you two more things

thing one (again): my man does not see this industrial rolling cart as the least bit marvelous and told me so, he also reckons in less than 6 months it will be in the garage. i did not waste my breath, i left the room quietly, knowing what i saw inside of my head, of life living with my newly acquired rolling cart and the potential of such a piece, was a match made in crafty styling heaven, not to mention my doily motives for my little green friends

thing two (again): i could not possibly have gotten to the end of the day without a) dabbling in little doily hammocks and b) painting over the blue distressed base of the trolley with a white distressed finish

base is now a distressed white (which it doesn't look at all in this picture, but pinky promise on close inspection there is distressed moments going on)

i spy with my little eye something beginning with 'L O'

this little one was made using old silk ribbon and a doily once shaped like a little crocheted basket, i just flattened the bottom with some natty stitching and cut off the handle

this little doily hammock was made using frayed knotted fabric strips

so this morning this is where my cog thinking is at.

*my trolley has a white coat

*i think i may wrap some fabric in places around the bars

*i see piles of blankets and cushions on the base

*i may remove some lanterns and make more doily hammocks

*perhaps turning it into an indoor dottie angel hanging gardens of babylon sort of thingy me jig

*i will except the fiddly-ness of removing little green friends each and every time they need watering

*i will continue to plot and plan my bricks and mortar store

*i will not allow my man's disgruntled ways cast a shadow upon my crafty proceedings

i have other cog thinking i wish to be doing, but for now i do not wish to overload my cogs and go batty...

dearest bathroom...

it has been five years since we meet. do you recall those early days? when mossy shed was so neglected and in need of some serious loving care. how i spent days, months nursing her back to health and in return she so very kindly became all i wished to have as a family home? and then i stopped short of you, and there you stayed, waiting patiently 

with your faux mustard marble counter top and shower enclosure, 

with your green 'seen better days, no never saw better days' carpet

with your lacking in door and privacy

and with your papered and painted several layered walls, and let us not forget your rusted sink and tap

(which we had to do a quick fix on when the plug hole fell through your bottom)

yes waiting patiently for your moment to shine, quietly for five whole long years, as all around you was loved. well my fine friend of a bathroom, it would appear your waiting days are over. 33 whole years on from when you were first put together, this week you are being taken apart and slowly but surely over the coming weeks, your neglected sad ways will be no more and like the ugly duckling, you will become a swan

not just any swan, my fine friend of a bathroom, no sirree!

 my vision of a swan

Tif x

If I Were a Man

I went back to work in March. With the help of a few good friends and their referral networks, I was (thankfully) quickly able to pull on a few clients and I have been freelancing from home while I work on starting my own company.



We recently committed to hiring full-time childcare (more on that soon) and with the increase in help I am able to take on more work. Last week I reached out to a few of my old colleagues and superiors and ask that they write a recommendation of my work on LinkedIn. Within a few hours I got an email alerting me to the fact that the CEO of my last company, whom I was very close with, had written me a recommendation. I eagerly clicked through to see what he had written and my heart literally dropped out of my chest.



The recommendation, by all accounts, was a good one. Except that in his efforts to compliment me and my work style he called me Type A, for all of the working world to see.

I had a friend over for brunch this weekend and we talked about this recommendation. She is one of the most career-oriented people I know. And she's damn good at what she does. She told me that she had been called Type A in recommendations too and took them down from her profile. And then she gave me a little nugget that has been eating away at me since. That this is the conundrum for women in business, especially women in technology. The way we are perceived and described. 

If I were a man, I'd be described as a go-getter, a workhorse, someone you'd kill to have on your team. Because I am a woman these qualities don't carry the same weight or meaning. 

In business, I am a ruthless editor, I expect everyone's best work and I multitask like nobody's business. These qualities served my last company well. I was a one person communications department. I wrote proposals that secured millions of dollars of funding while maintaining ten websites, rewriting textbooks, generating multiple newsletters, organizing training programs, managing our event schedule and conference logistics, and working with external teams to manage PR. I never missed a deadline and the only time I complained about our process to management was after working at 26 hour day because the software we used to generate proposals ate our document the day before it was due, and I stayed at the office to rework the entire thing and get it out on time. 

So now I am faced with this pejorative recommendation and the decision of whether to take it down or own it. Clearly I would have preferred to be described as detail-oriented, meticulous or thorough. A hustler or a self-starter. 

But Type-A? 

I guess I should just be thankful that the recommendation didn't end with "...who left to have kids..."

small and mighty...

there's a saying somewhere, 

i don't know where 

and i don't know exactly how it goes, 

but it is a long the lines of 

'out of small changes come big things'. 

and that my dearest reader, 

is exactly how i have been living since last september. 

its been my motivation to keep on keeping on.

to not feel beat

when my body told me so... 

small little changes is all that was needed 

to make the mountain

into mole hills

and slowly but surely 

it has added up to a mighty big change. 

a change for good.

one small change:

growing seeds... 

sunflowers, sweet peas and geraniums beginning to shine 

the seeds i planted,

 just a little while ago, 

have become seedlings and grow stronger by the day,

it makes me marvel

at their winning ways

i want to be that seedling

small and mighty

one small change:

homegrown strawberries

quite possibly the sweetest most delicious strawberries

i have ever tasted.

1 for me

and 

2 for Our #3

 just the other day...

how wonderful it felt

to offer up some homegrown goodness

to my child

albeit small

but it felt most mighty

one small change:

succulents and sedums

truth be told,

i did not think i had inherited my father's

magical way with greenie goodness

but now i am beginning to think 

i just never gave it a chance,

i never took the time to stand still long enough

till now that is.

now all i wish to do is nurture my little green friends...

when i find them, i bring them home

and i re house them in a thrift store find,

be it ceramic, tin, wicker or glass.

and that is all i need to do

for them to know i love them.

and in return, they start to grow

and before i know it,

i have myself a little indoor garden of my own.

one in the family room

and one in the kitchen

(not shown)

a miracle of greeny goodness

reflecting how they might be small

but together with friends

they can be mighty

one small change:

home cooking

not my forte, nor my craft

i have always so wished it to be,

however it took my body to final shout loud enough

for me to make the food i eat a priority

in my day to day living

and in turn

what i feed my clan.

will i ever be a master chef?

no sirree! not me,

will i ever be able to knock up a simple cake?

yes sirree! yes me!

simply a small gesture,

making my lads of three

mighty happy

one small change:

putting things in my shop window

patches of positivity 

and other handmade goodness...

slowly but surely

adding small amounts at a time

makes me know

things are beginning to look mighty fine

one small change:

yoga

(not shown)

twice weekly

(if my bod and my head is willing and able)

meditating

(as and when)

cocooning

(as and when)
finding my light
(each and every day)

this small tiny change

has alone moved a mountain,

proving to me

small surely can become mighty

all these small changes 

alongside of help from friends, family & drs

have led to big changes...

over the past 9 months

along this journey of searching

and indeed finding my way,

i continue to take one day at a time,

knowing some days will be good days

and others are less so

but always

being thankful for the small things

and marveling how they in turn,

have helped me grow in a mighty way